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Ask Sensei

This is the section where you get to ask for advice on any subject you like. The weather, sports, ladies, how to GET ladies, co-worker disputes, being a nice guy, acting, raising children, delivering bad news, allocating proper punishments, and practically anything else you can think of. I will always answer your questions in a timely and helpful fashion. So…ASK AWAY!

5 Comments leave one →
  1. September 23, 2010 4:12 pm

    Any advice on getting a lady for me?

    • September 24, 2010 2:49 am

      Wheeeeew, isn’t this the question everyone has been asking since the dawn of time? Without knowing too much about your situation, I can provide only the most important piece of advice. Find who you want, and go get her. I’m assuming that looking for a lady implies you don’t already have one. If you don’t have a lady, then how much worse could it get? Answer: none. Rejection isn’t really that bad, AND the good news is that there are ladies allllll around us. Anyways, if that doesn’t work put an ad in the paper reading, “Need love. Want Lady. Maybe you? Me? Yes. Call tonight for free dinner”

  2. Zebra permalink
    September 24, 2010 5:25 am

    How come horses don’t know how to dress?

    • September 24, 2010 10:45 am

      This is a great question. I think the answer is twofold. Horses don’t know how to dress because they lack modern sensibility and opposable thumbs. Every horse I have ever met was sooooo old fashioned. They just run around with that little blanket on, sometimes a saddle. I blame it on their upbringing. Most ranchers never give the little colts a chance to wear something a bit more up to date.

      The second point is that horses don’t have opposable thumbs. This makes the act of “getting dressed” impossible for them to achieve by themselves. Even if a horse had modern sensibility, it wouldn’t do ’em any good. Perhaps there is a market for hip, modern clothes for horses. I think you could corner the market


  3. joshsuds permalink
    September 24, 2010 8:21 am

    How can I hit it big on a slot machine?

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